Kissmet

Tonight I watched a delicious play out here in my new hood.  By myself.  I do a lot by myself these days when M takes the kids.

The play was about fate, destiny and beliefs.  It was light, entertaining and very engaging to me.  I enjoy live theatre very much.

Here is what I believe right now.  Right here.

1.  There are no actual reason why things happen in my life, they just happen and that is life.  That is the reason.  Layla didn't happen for a "reason".  She happened and has given me reasons.

2.  That life is good.  Nature is inherently and naturally organic and good.  Birds chirp = pleasant.  Sunshine = vitamin D, bare skin, warmth = all good times.  Rain = very good.  Snow = fun for kids = happy kids = good.

3.  I believe in the Dalai Lama:  “I believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness. That is clear. Whether one believes in religion or not, whether one believes in this religion or that religion, we all are seeking something better in life. So, I think, the very motion of our life is towards happiness…”

Dalai Lama

4.  More human kindness and action driven by this can cure most things - the energy of kindness and giving is so incredibly strong.  Try doing something really really kind and the expression that it will invoke in the receiver of your kindness will make you feel so good.  

5.  Goodness of being starts at home.  I must be better to those whom I  hold closest in my life more than anyone else that I give myself too.  

6.  Being alone with myself is ok. 

7.  When I heard that Davy Jones died recently (rip), my first thought was how much I loved the Monkee with the hat.  LLLLOOOOOVVVED

8.  I believe I am on a belief roll!

9.  This one is tricky to articulate.... 

I really want others to tell me what I know that I need to know. I like hearing what I already know in my infinite wisdom from those that love and support me.

10.  Right now I don't know everything that I am outwardly doing.  But that I am doing and leading with my heart.

11.  Fate is what happens to me during my living.  

12.  I know that nothing is wrong.   

Disconnect

Seems that my typing fingers have disconnected from my body and more importantly, my brain.
My father in law is leaving us and the family is in despair. 

What more can I say?  I'm shocked and in the throws of the upheaval of tragedy striking our family.  His brain is housing a tumor that is wreaking havoc - very suddenly, very quickly.

Two months ago, he was behaving erratically.  But, even the erraticness set on so quick, with little warning.  So much so that Mum thought he was having a chemical imbalance of sorts, or a stress-induced mental breakdown.  He went from "normal" (more or less) to talking and acting nonsensibly to calmly agreeing going to the hospital with Michael to being in an "End of life" hospice centre.

What the fuck.